via The Huffington Post.
My faith in pizza guys has gone up 123%
NO LET ME TELL YOU A STORY
So a few weeks ago I was in a hotel in Savannah with my grampa in the hospital next door, Mom was over staying with him, and the battery in the smoke detector went out so every 5 minutes it would let off this loud, high pitched ‘CHIRP’.
It was annoying as fuck, so I called the front desk to see if they had a battery for it, and they said the only thing they could do was change rooms. We’d already settled in for the night, and needed the next door rooms for my uncles the next day, so I said I’d deal. My uncles had my car in the next town over, so I couldn’t drive and get one myself.
An hour later, I’m ordering pizza and have gone insane because the damn thing CHIRPS. SO. MUCH.
So I begged the pizza guy on the phone to stop and get me a battery, told him I’d pay for the battery, and give him an extra tip for it, and he was chill with it. This adorable fucker gets to my room with the battery, opens it, asks to see the smoke detector, CLIMBS ON THE BED, CHANGES THE BATTERY FOR ME, and tests it.
My pizza was only 20 dollars, but I gave him 40 and told him to keep the change.
I am clearly not fully utilizing my pizza delivery person…..
What’s next pizza delivery hitmen
included in this order for a large ground beef is a dossier containing information on your target. he is to be neutralized before delivery. do not let him reach the airport. no pepperoni.
via The Huffington Post.
i just walked past 2 construction dudes and one of em just said “i don’t think they’re right-handed or left-handed. they’re just dogs.”
That face you make when you find weird shit at stores, and then offer it to your friend.
This describes my entire shopping experience when I’m with other people.
This is also why I typically shop alone.
you’ve got a lil’ somethin’ right there
remember that one time i told mark sheppard i’d get whatever he replied to me with tattooed on my body
i got that tattoo tonight
Let’s play a game called: Actual Supernatural line or not?
Does this mean we can finally clear up the origin of THIS line?
They’re both real lines
And the infamous:
Two more for the bonus round
what even is this show
It makes me happy that all these lines are from the show
If you were a computer-loving male child who took a lot of shit from your peers, I suspect you heard something similar from the adults in your life. Maybe it was “Sure, things are bad now, but when you’re a little bit older, women will LOVE guys like you!” Or maybe it was “That kid who makes fun of you now will be working at a gas station when you run a big fancy computer company and marry a supermodel!” If you were once young, nerdy and male, it is not unlikely that your future sense of self-worth was funded with a non-consensual IOU from the world’s women. It’s taken me a long time, but at this point I genuinely believe that much of this “GEEKS SHALL INHERIT THE EARTH” rhetoric is little more than patriarchy’s bespectacled wingman. It excuses the pain that systems of power exert on children by promising little boys future dominion over little girls. It is deeply and massively fucked.
oh my god this…
Are computer-loving female children fed these same lines? Are they told “SOME DAY YOU WILL HAVE ALL THE MONEY AND POWERS AND MEN WILL FLOCK TO YOU LIKE AUTONOMY-DEPRIVED MAN-ZOMBIES?” If you insist that the presence of enough computers magically transforms the world into a meritocracy, you might want to think about that one for a second.